COUPLES COUNSELLING CAN ENCOURAGE CARING BEHAVIOURS
Often in long term relationships encouraging caring behaviours can erode.
Over time couples settle into the routines of daily living in such a way that they focus less on caring behaviours.
The initial joy of the relationship can become a job. Regardless of whether the relationship is new or long term a sense of security and a sense of intimacy needs to be there.
Partners can create a positive loop of closeness and responsiveness when caring behaviours are practiced and sustained.
This then allows you to understand more about your own needs and that of your partner’s.
Effective communication is crucial in a relationship. Couples counselling can show you how to focus on desired caring behaviours that can often foster the experience of a romantic bond.
A well-known fact is a common enemy brings people together and it is important to see your partner as your friend not the enemy.
With couples counselling you can see your negative patterns of interaction are the enemy, not each other.
Sharing with genuine dialogue increases trust and responsiveness and longer-term satisfaction.
REMEMBER that neglect will kill love
CLICHES about love “when you are loved you are freer” are all true
There is NO PERFECT PERFORMANCE in love
BONDING happens with key moments when one person reaches for the other and the other persons responds with care.
A PRACTICE TO DO TOGETHER
Build a positive relationship bank account by focusing on making daily deposits.
If the bank account is ahead, when you do make a withdrawal the bank account does not go into deficit.
- On your own make a list of all the things your partner does that makes you feel cared about
- Make time to share with each other, one or two items on your list, choose one or all these openers
- Do this activity every day
I feel loved when you…..
I feel special when you…..
I feel really cared about when you…..